Best Extra Stout

Best Extra Stout
Cooper Brewery, Australia

Importer: Pierhead Purchasing Ltd., Belvedere
Strength: 6.3% ABV
Form: 375ml bottle
Price: £1.49 (Nelson Wines, South Wimbledon)

This one isn't being reviewed to the usual standards, I'm afraid. The warmup (which, given the lack of actual food in the flat, is also called “breakfast”) was three doubles of Bombay Sapphire and Schweppes tonic. So, I'm perhaps not entirely 100% to start with. The palate wanted something different, and this was selected at random from the random booze stash. Well picked, intuition. (To clarify, it was 1pm, rather than 9am. British slobs getting up in the afternoon, I don't know...)

This was cracked open with Psycho Bottle Opener which lifted the cap clean away. This doesn't bode well. It was poured into the dregs of the Bombay Sapphire, i.e. a few half-melted icecubes that were dampened with gin. A rather encouraging brown foamy head formed, although it dissipated fairly quickly.

I don't have much faith in Ozzie beer. An Ozzie of my acquaintance tells me that British Fosters is much more drinkable than Australian Fosters, which is impressive given that British Fosters is corrosive undrinkable shite. A previous review of VB confirmed that they couldn't brew beer if their life depended on it.

... and then there's this stuff.

This one leaves me with a bit of a dilemma. While I'm quite convinced that Australia can only brew piss and good old Blighty is the only place that can make drinkable beer, this one's not actually all that bad. Unlike VB, that claims to be a bitter but is some sort of piss-poor lager that pissed-up British lager louts would quite rightly avoid, this is indeed a stout. And “Best” is fair game.

Your Humble Narrator's palate is already sufficiently tainted to be able to do it justice, but it is quite happily hitting the spot and I fear that when the bottom of the glass is hit, I will be mourning its loss. Its more-ishness is, well, more-ish.

That it's 6.3% may have something to do with it. But it's still quite drinkable. The British refererence - Guinness, never mind that it's Irish - is complete shite in comparison. (Well, actually, it's complete shite, full stop.) I also have a soft spot for stout and will pick it in preference to unknown bitters. Coopers Best Extra Stout actually matches British stouts.

I salute you, Australia. You've finally proven you can make something not only quite drinkable, but even more-ish.

Rating: 7 out of 10.

Reviewed: 2006-10-29